Still Here

Well I am still here taking it day by day. I hate being without a computer and I think I'm beginning to suffer from withdrawal symptoms. I really want to transfer the ending of The Case of the Dead Husband on to disk but I have to wait until I get a computer to do so. The soon to be X has hired an attorney to make sure he gets what he wants. I'm not sure what he expects but I have nothing to hide. I have left with what little I could carry and left the rest to him. He will not even help out our daughter who desperately needs help with the baby and his medicine. However he tells everyone that he is helping her but he refuses to even buy diapers. I don't understand how he can be the way he is. I have began to activly search for another job because at Wal-Mart I do not have the time or energy to promote my first book Out of the Texas Mist. I have however learned how to strike up a conversation with just about anyone and shamelessly tell them about Out of the Texas Mist as I hand them my card.The Temp to Perm Agency that I have applied at has already called to let me know they have forwarded my resume to a business here in Marble that needs a receptionist. Wooo Whoo I am on my way. At least I can say I am still being positive and doing things the right way. I am a good person and I will receive what is rightfully mine because that is what the universe and karma demands. Tom can do all he wants and believe what he wants but the truth will prevail in the end.

A Work of Love

I have had a rough couple of weeks. Wal-Mart is wearing me down and I must admit it is wearing on my sunny disposition. I decided that I need to do something artistic to lift my spirits so I bought a 3 pack of canvas yesterday then came home to paint. I remembered finding a sweet picture of Domino and wanted to paint a tribute to my little monkey. I grabbed the picture, my pencils and paints then sat down on the sofa. The next thing I knew I felt better and had a finished 16x20 painting of the Bisguinator. I'm glad that I am off today and tomorrow and I think maybe i should paint some more but more importantly I think I may need to start looking for another job. When the one you have starts to make you unhappy then that means you do not belong there. Life is too short for unhappiness. Oh and i had some good news. The future X filed for divorce. I was planning on doing so when I saved the filing fee but he beat me to it because he thinks he will get a better deal. The secret is I win no matter what because he will never be able to hurt me again. I don't care he can have it all as long as I have my peace of mind I am the winner.

Haven't Been Kissed

Sometimes when you spend too much time alone you end up reflecting on things in life that have affected you or passed you by. Last night as Mater gave me a real sloppy kiss I thought back to the past men in my life. The sad thing was I realized that I haven’t been kissed by a man since July 5, 2002. Now I must admit I did not decide to set this goal in life I guess it just happened because I allowed my self to stay in a bad situation for far too long. Now I guess my excuse is I have been just going it day by day and not actually caring about having someone in my life other than the two fur covered individuals that I choose to spend my time with. I go to work, associate with those that I enjoy then come home to two dogs. The question that I am forced to face is do I actually want to have a significant other in my life? Well yes I actually do but how do you go about finding that person? I guess since I am so busy writing about my fictitious life I have neglected my real life. I am so out of practice will I actually know what to do? I admit I have enjoyed the dream time love up to a point but I have to admit I miss being held and being touched. Now that I have relayed how pathetic I am maybe I will find the right person because I have stated that I am ready. So lets get to it Universe I’m ready, willing and able.

It Quacks me up

I was taught a valuable lesson years ago but for some reason I choose to repeat it over and over again. The lesson is do not feed a stray because it then becomes your responsibility. I learned this lesson by feeding countless kittens, cats, dogs and pups. I also learned if you feed the squirrels and birds they come to expect it. I have met a number of squirrels that would come and look in the windows and storm door wondering where the food was. There has been a few that would even knock not caring that there were several Boston Terriers on the other side that would love to take a bite out of them. There even has been a tricky booger that learned I kept the squirrel food in the large plastic bucket on the front porch. It took her all of two days of watching me fill the feeders then she helped herself by eating a hole in the lid of the bucket.
Now after caring for animals for the majority of my life I screwed up once again. I was saying how having just the two dogs to care for was so easy to do until I screwed up and fed a gaggle of ducks that live somewhere near by. I know there is a large pit with water in it across the way but I don't know who the ducks belong to. Now when I go outside or come in from work the ducks race across the road to see me knowing I have a soft heart and will feed them bread or what ever I find. Now that I feel sorry for the skinny ducks I guess I will stop off at the local feed store and purchase some duck feed. I guess that is what I get for having a soft heart but I look at it this way I have about a dozen new friends.

Saturday August 9 ,2008 Hurry Up and Wait

Since I have lost my computer thanks to a processor that has burned I will have to do my blog in my little spiral notebook then post when possible. Today's blog is for two days.

Saturday August, 9, 2008

Hurry Up and Wait

A wise woman told me that I was headed to the place I belonged. She told me to be patient and take one step at a time. I respect her advice because I know it came from her heart. I know my destiny is calling but i don't know the when, how or where. I know I'm close because I feel the pull. As I was writing a passage in my current novel Case of the Dead Husband I realized that I had touched on something so eerie it sent chill bumps up my arms. I don't know what my destiny is but I did know it was calling from the 830 area code. I know I belong here in the Texas Hill Country. The hard part is being patient. I feel at times like I'm just spinning my wheels. I'm growing tired of the hard crusty part and I am wanting to get to the soft sweet center and enjoy the life I'm meant to live. I know, I know you have to take it one step at a time in order to appreciate the end result. I know these little bumps in the road are there to keep me awake and concentrating on the lessons I need to learn. I know I need to face the challenges to make me the person I need to become but it is just a slow process and I am one of the hurry up generation. I guess I just need to learn how to hurry up and wait.