I've Got It

When I look in the mirror I see the dark circles under my eyes and the bald head but I just can’t believe that I have cancer. I know I’m tired all of the time, have  to deal with dry itchy skin, issues with the digestive system, heartburn, achy joints and bones along with the fact food has a medicine taste. I have weird cravings and nausea but it is still hard to believe that I have cancer.

The good part is I get up every morning remain positive and attempt to stay busy. I was on my way to a wonderful career of teaching at the college level only to be knocked backward. We struggle to pay the bills and the cost of transportation to the many doctor, lab and infusion treatments. This doesn’t include the extra needs for a cancer patient.

I am not cancer I am a woman that is dealing with the process of treating cancer. I am strong in heart and mind even though my body is cursing me for introducing the cancer killing drugs that are demolishing the tumor as I write this. Chemo therapy is not only harsh on cancer cells but it is also harsh on the human body. Generally people don’t die from cancer, they die from complications of the cancer like pneumonia from being bed ridden, heart problems brought on by the drugs that are used in chemotherapy, strokes and even suicide due to the depression brought on by having cancer.

Some say if the treatment is so bad why go through it? We go through it because no matter how bad it gets during the treatment we know that the cancer is being killed. We go through it because we know that by going through the treatment our life will be extended. We go through it because we don’t want to have cancer!